Thursday, August 30, 2007
When to say no
So as an afterthought of my last post, I thought I would ask the peanut gallery about something that I have been struggling with for a while now. I have been in my calling in our ward for over a year now. It's been a rough year... family stuff, moving, babies. I've had one active committee member. We always have a great turnout and everyone is willing to bring food, but only a small handful of people who are willing to really pitch in. Which usually leaves me, Wil, and Lin to do the bulk of the work. I'm ready to call it quits, but this is where the dilemma comes in. When is it right to ask to be released? Is it ever right? Do I just pray my little heart out that a miracle will happen? Do I need to stop my whining and deal with it? Ideas, suggestions? I feel like I've hit a large brick wall and have no inspiration or desire left to get stuff done... and of course an activity looming at the end of October.
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3 comments:
I was never one to turn down a calling or to ask to be released from my calling, but when I was serving as Relief Society President and had given birth to my second child who was colicky and was 18 months younger than my oldest child, and my husband then got called into the BISHOPRIC and they felt no cause to release me or to even ask if I felt okay continuing on in that capacity, I felt okay to ask to be released. "One or the other, please!" Someone needed to help with the kids and to stay home with them on "meeting nights". I feel like when it interferes with your ability to be a healthy and functioning mom and wife (your #1 job), you have to say no, or at least say, "I need some serious help with my committee!"
Our current ward has something called a "family filter". So, they have JB serving as YM President and then they take it easy on the spouse (I'm an RS teacher). This way it doesn't put too much strain on the parents to be parents. You don't overburden the couple with two heavy responsibilities at once.
I also learned from our former ward that people don't know unless you tell them, and you have to tell them directly w/o sugar-coating things. I ended up writing it all down in a letter, because I often end up saying "yes" when I wanted to say "no". In a letter, I've said it all, and there's no backing down!
Okay, I'm done. I know not everyone will agree w/ me on this one.
I usually do not ask to be released either-but when I was RS president in my ward here in MS--(the back woods of the church I feel most of the time)--I could not do it anymore-emotionally, physically or mentally. It was very diffucult here--for various reasons that I will not get into. I agree with Amy in the fact that you have to take care of you and the family FIRST! If you need help with an activity for Oct--until they release you--I have one--TRUNK OR TREAT!
When I was in YW we did this as a ward activity and have been doing it for 7 years now! You have a festival-bobbing for apples, face painting, candy in a jar counting, bean bag toss, cake walk, and fishing game. The kids get little prizes--I will tell you all about it in an email or call me--but at the end of the evening--the ward members have decorated their trunks of their vehicles and hand out candy in the parking lot--it is a blast!! You line the cars up facing all the same way--and the kids just go! I know it seems like a lot--but not really--I did not have a committee and pulled it off--get the other organizations to help-ie RS, PRIMARY, YM, YW, etc. Hang in there--you will know what to do! I think you will just know when the time is right--and sounds like it is soon! Love ya!
Thank you, ladies for your words of comfort and advice. They really made me feel a lot better! I have Ward Council this weekend and we'll see how things go.
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